Monday, November 9, 2009
Jan told me this early this year, and now i get the full picture of what he was trying to say. Yeah i really do.

In "When i'm gone", Eminem asked, "What happens when you become the main source of her pain". And now i'm asking myself that question.

It's hard to hold onto something when you aren't confident yourself that at the end of the road you'll get it. It's tiring to endure day after day, putting up a smile each day to portray that you're okay, but deep down inside nothing's ever okay, and it hurts. Worst of all, it kills to know that you mean a mere more than nothing to the person that means almost everything to you.

Everyday, hopes are destroyed, dreams are shattered, lives are lost. Is it gonna be my turn soon? Is everything that i've been holding on to just gonna disappear one day and karma's just gonna come back at me and hit me in the face? Sometimes i wonder what i've done wrong. Maybe it was back in last year, when i didnt cherish what i had, when i hurt someone else when that person was in a similar situation as i'm in now. Is that why things are like this now?

I'm tired, both physically and mentally. I feel like letting go, not just in this context, but literally everything. Sometimes i do wish that my time on earth would be up and God would just take me away. But i guess life isn't that all easy is it? Yeah, cos life's a bitch. Isn't it?

A positive anything is better than a negative nothing

-KeNeS|s- Out


|Kenrick| 9:59 PM|

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